<p><span style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;" _mce_style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;">In <em>Bereishis,18:7</em> it says in reference to his preparing for guests that <em>Avraham</em> ran to the cattle and then gave the animals to the child to prepare. <em>Rashi</em> explains that the child is referring to <em>Yishmael</em>. <em>Avraham Avinu</em> wanted to be <em>mechanech</em> his son. We also find in 18:19 that <em>Hashem </em>said he must reveal to <em>Avraham</em> what will happen in <em>Sedom</em> because “I know that he will be <em>mechanech</em> his household to <em>tzedaka</em> and what is right.” The <em>Meshech Chochma </em>says this is the source for the <em>mitzvah</em> of <em>Chinuch</em>. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;" _mce_style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;">The <em>Mishna Berurah 47:10</em> says that a father and mother should always be <em>davening</em> that their children should learn <em>Torah</em> and be <em>tzaddikim</em> and <em>baalei midos tovos</em>. The <em>kavana</em> should be in the <em>bracha</em> of <em>Ahava Raba/Ahavas Olam</em>, when saying <em>birchas haTorah</em> (<em>venihyeh anachnu</em> <em>vetzetzaeinu</em>), and when saying <em>Uva Letziyon</em> (one should have his children in mind by <em>l’man lo niga lorik velo neileid labeholo</em>.) </span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;" _mce_style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;">Where in the <em>bracha</em> of <em>Ahava Rabba</em> are we <em>davening</em> for our children? The answer must be that for parents to get their children to become <em>baalei Torah</em> and <em>baalei mitzvos</em>, it is incumbent upon the parents to first become <em>baalei Torah</em> and <em>baalei mitzvos</em> themselves. It is only after the parents become <em>mechubar</em> to <em>Hashem</em> that they may expect the children to follow suit. In <em>Birchas</em> <em>Hatorah</em> we say <em>venihyeh anachnu vetzetzeinu </em>only after we <em>daven</em> for <em>ve’haarev</em> <em>na</em>. If the <em>Torah</em> is sweet to the parents, it will become sweet to the children also. The same concept applies to <em>Uva Letzion</em>. We say <em>l’maan lo niga lorik velo</em> <em>neileid labehala</em>. We <em>daven</em> this for our children only after we say <em>hu yiftach</em> <em>libeinu</em> <em>besoraso</em> etc earlier. It is only after we ourselves have our hearts opened to the <em>Torah</em> that we can <em>daven</em> that our children should have their hearts opened. This truly clarifies that when we <em>daven Ahava Raba</em>, that <em>Hashem</em> should light up our eyes to learn the <em>Torah</em>, we not only have in mind ourselves but by extension we have our children in mind. That is the only way to be successful in raising children who will learn <em>Torah</em>. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;" _mce_style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;">This is really a lesson in <em>chinuch</em> as a whole. Parents need to understand that it is not do as I say, but rather do as I do. Leading a life like that will bring about successful <em>chinuch</em> for the children. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;" _mce_style="font-size: large; font-family: times new roman, times;">Let us hope that we all become better ourselves thereby helping our children become better too. </span></p>
âMommy, If I Beat Cancer Once, Why Did It Come Back?â
September 15, 2026 2:34 pm
